Single moms, a personal choice – or not

March 10, 2016
single moms

There are many single moms out there. Some have chosen that way of life, some have not. It seems to me that, regardless of where you live, a family of two people married to each other is still the nuclear, traditional type.  OK, so maybe the institution of a marriage is a thing of the past (although this doesn’t go for all places on earth), but a married couple with children is always a welcome and a generally accepted model. The future fathers proudly walk by their pregnant wives: the larger the belly, the smugger they look. The wife complains and asks for help, the husband runs to her aid and supports her.

And if you’re alone in all that? Like me, for example. In that case, the best thing is to be healthy. I was perfectly healthy, I had no problems at all during my pregnancy. It also important to be reasonable and well organized. To think much and think ahead. To be aware of what is to come and what you may need. And to always know that you can’t really count on anyone but yourself. Of course, friends are always there, and that’s great, but the responsibility ultimately lies only with you. I was the one who took charge of everything. The father-to-be floated around me, in the haze of indecision and uncertainty: now when I think about it, is seems as though he fully grasped what was going on only at the very end of my pregnancy. Besides, he had another pregnant woman to take care of, whom he got pregnant a few months before and who was his official partner. Not many of our former mutual friends even knew about my condition.

I am prudent and well organized by nature. Maybe even too much so, as everybody always say that I worry about details and plan too much. I, on the other hand, really believe that the good organization is a key to success, and I was true to myself in this case as well. I studied carefully all websites and advice the Internet could provide. I made lists, spoke to my girlfriends. I would even occasionally stop to chat with passers-by who took their babies out for a walk: “Are you happy with this stroller? Was it the right choice?” Don’t laugh! I knew that I was responsible for everything and I was determined to prepare the best I could. I should also confess that I had everything I could need (and what I couldn’t possibly make any use of) when I was six months pregnant. Absolutely everything.

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