I love to read the stories posted on the websites which deal with similar topics like mine. The approaches to this sensitive subject may be different, but there is one common thread to all of them, tying all our life stories together. Much has been written about the kids with divorced parents, about the kids whose parents never lived together or about those who have never met their father. What is common to all these stories is that all mothers put their children first. They work hard to support and bring their children up, and their kids are always on their minds.
It’s easy for me identify with all those mothers. Of course, our circumstances are different and we are different people, with our own mindsets and solutions devised to solve our problems.
Is it hard? Yes, very often it is.
I admit I’m not a perfect mother. Is it because I’m too bossy and have a tendency to control everything around me? Or is it because I’m often afraid of the future and the fact that I can ultimately rely only on myself?
I admit I’m nervous sometimes.
I admit I often act like a dictator.
I admit I often forget that a child is – well, only a child.
We can’t expect our children to understand that we occasionally feel tired or frustrated. A child wants to play, to sing, to be cheerful. It’s normal for a child to make a mess and although we might want them to be as obedient as little troopers, it is seldom possible or even natural. Children need their freedom, adventures, to see how far they can go. And their mothers, out of too much fear or feeling of responsibility, tend to place too many constraints on them and control them even when we should let them loose, let them breathe.
I want to make some promises to myself and to my child:
That I will try never shout at her again.
That from now on, however tired or busy, I’ll always find the time to play with her.
That I will take her to a park whenever she feels like it.
That I will read her stories every evening.
That I will never reach for my mobile phone and my laptop when we’re together.
That I will always find the time for her when she needs it.
That I will always smile and be cheerful
That, from now on, I will start making good on the promises I make.